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Sunday 8 December
2002
the (un)glamourous life of tracey
so, the last few days haven't been the best for me. i don't want to keep on about it anymore, so all i'll say is that i was effected so much so that my health problems took about 5 steps back to what i've been trying to acheive the past year now? anyways, with the help of Regan and a close knit of good friends, i'm hoping that come christmas/new years time, things will feel better.
it may come to as a surprise to alot of people, but to the rest, the decision to close Revolve was a long long time coming. i have had personal offline problems as well as financial problems, and the maintenance of a big community such as Revolve is now going to be out of my hands. Revolve was a personal project of mine that, yes, i did take seriously and personally moreso than others, and it is sad to see it go. it was 16 months of different experiences that i was happy to be a part of and am ready to see survive in some way or another.
there have been many things said about me on Revolve, and i'm sure in private too. i understand that people do not think much of me, and that's okay because you obviously do not know me so well anymore or want to know me. like i've said, i hold no negative feelings to the people that are defensive of what has happened the last few days because i'm sure that they feel that all of this just 'came up' suddenly.
to say that i'm not hurt by any of this would be a lie. but we all really need to get on with our lives and can't light fires (no pun intended) where there was really no need to. i have given my best wishes to everyone involved and will continue to, even when they still show us hostility. their idea for a new community is a great one, and although people have been telling me to not help them with any advice, i am currently trying to work this out as a kind of offering to show people that i am making an effort for them, still. even though they continue to make excuses for themselves, i am happy to suggest alternative ideas if it keeps even a few people together. i do support their request for a new community, however i feel i am not needed for that to happen. i should not feel obligated to help out in such a grand way, but because there have been one or two people that have been respectful, i am willing to let my feelings towards some people die down so we can work towards something positive.
i only wish that through everything from now on, that everyone would please take time before they post something negative about me, Kinetic or any of my friends. there is certainly no need to lower ourselves to any more name calling and offensive posts/emails. we all know that we're different, and it seems pointless to make fun of something that you're not involved in. as always, you're free to say whatever you want, but really, why do you need to badger someone for posting something that might actually mean something to them? there was never any Revolve vs. Kinetic war that people have jumped in and created on their own accord, and i hope it doesnt continue to this extent at the new place - even though i expect it
as for Kinetic, registrations will continue to be closed for the meantime. there are ALOT of other message boards that close their registrations permanently after hitting a certain number, i would not be the first if i chose that option. it's just a matter of whether it's worth letting people register alias' to flame us again. and anyhow, the people that wanted to register and post art would of already done so - KE was no secret and was opened for registrations for a month.
anyway, i have talked my ass off about this with a couple of people, and i am alot calmer and open to people when they come to me with an useful and understanding suggestion. i always say that i am more than happy to email people if they have a civil comment about things, and you're still welcomed to. i would rather people talk directly to me via email or PM's if they have a problem with anything, we all deserve that respect (though i haven't been shown much lately).
it's probably going to take them a couple more days to figure out what they want to do, and i will give them that. Revolve isn't Revolve anymore, and we should all just act our age and get on with our lives, right?
