argh, “it’s” still happening. i’m still freaking out and i still hate it. <\/p>\n
i do forget that it’s not a quick fix and i can’t magically just feel better just because i should. the best thing right now is not to get worked up about it – i really want to enjoy tommorrow and i hope and hope that i’m not going to go ‘crazy’ right in the middle of it. i think that if i went with my ‘issues’ i wouldn’t be celebrating anything tommorrow and i would stay at home on the couch, angry at myself because i didn’t try. i can’t be ‘the girl that didn’t try’ for the rest of my life. it’s time to grow up. <\/p>\n
i really miss the old-Tracey and i wonder what ever happened to her, and whether she’s going to come back. i’ve been trying to pinpoint ‘what happened’ to make me feel like this and i don’t think it’s just 1 thing that happened to me or around me. one thing about anxiety issues is that i don’t think there really is anything rational about why it happens (at least to me). i don’t think i’m a nervous person, i’m smart enough to know what’s wrong and right, but yet i still get stuck time from time. <\/p>\n
so i’m starting to ramble now, and perhaps that’s a good thing. i think i never really let what i’m really thinking out and that’s part of why the issues never get solved. anyway, i’m turning the commenting back on and hopefully the spammers won’t bother taking over again, but i really want some constructive talk going on about anxiety and general craziness. there’s not enough of it around … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
argh, “it’s” still happening. i’m still freaking out and i still hate it. i do forget that it’s not a quick fix and i can’t magically just feel better just because i should. the best thing right now is not to get worked up about it – i really want to enjoy tommorrow and i […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-751","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-anything-everything"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=751"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=751"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=751"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sh1ft.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=751"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}