we’re still chugging along here in our household, but of course i think about Jovie’s situation every. single. day.
it’s tough to relay the updates to friends without breaking down slightly, because in this stage of the diagnosis – there really is no news. (we have no diagnosis yet). the only thing i can journal here on my blog is the big wide space that is ‘our future’ that we can’t fill in, yet.
having a conversation about where to buy adult nappies for Jovie, for ‘later on’, really hits reality hard in the nuts. there’s a huge possiblity she’ll never be toilet trained. there’s a possibility we still have to budget for 3 to 4 poops or pee’s a day, in 20 years time. i’m still in a bit of a grief stage, where all the dreams i imagined for my daughter are slowly being released one by one like a bunch of balloons that run away from you. but as i think about helping her, getting her into therapies and standing by her side – those balloons get replaced with others.
a parent will always dream big for their kids, our dreams are just different now.
so in the meantime, i’m trying to make our own happy memories, bring some colour back into our lives so that at least i’ve lived life and saved the strength for whatever is to come.
yima • 
Meegs RCN •