despite my personal battle with confidence, when it comes to my kids i’m pretty relentless..
our family is doing the 3km fun walk/run at the Rebel Sport Run4Fun in November in Sydney – and I decided it would be a great opportunity to form Team Jovie and raise funds for Rett Syndrome research in Australia! i found some time yesterday to create the website and voila, it’s up!
www.teamjovie.com
if you’re in Sydney, you can sign up to run with us under ‘Team Jovie’, but anyone can donate via our fundraising page at everydayhero. i set the target to $1,000 and thanks to my awesome friends & family we’re already a quarter of a way there 🙂 go team!
i’m hoping that this project will help me come out of my shell because it’s dearly important to me. every little bit that is raised goes to research within Australia, that will ultimately help our children now and in the future.
my next project is to get those Rett Syndrome cards designed and printed!
I’m working hard at changing the way I think about myself.
When I was asked last week, to list 5 positive things about myself, I couldn’t do it. Isn’t that terrible? I know there are good things about me and things that I know I’m good at, but when it comes to saying the words and committing it to paper, I just couldn’t. It’s becoming a problem when it comes to pursuing personal projects that I love, which is why I’m probably going to be in therapy a little while longer… To figure out why, and to learn how to move forward, and keep moving forward, without a knot in my stomach, with my face tense and my toes curled. I could give you 5 excuses about why my photography sucks. I can tell you 5 people that do everything better than I can. I worked in a job for 11 years but never mentioned the company name here or to my friends.
I don’t know why I’m like this, but I know it’s not how I want to live the rest of my life. So much has happened in the last year, and I think this problem has been around longer than that, but hasn’t been around my whole life.
I think other people feel this way too – and it’s not ‘being shy’. The inability to give yourself credit and be proud of your work, to show it off to others and not feel sick about the feedback you get. I wish I had that again. I know I had it before, and I want to know where it went.
Chantelle wrote that this fear is paralysing, and I relate to it – but I have no idea what I’m afraid of. Being successful? The attention? Asking people to look at what I have to offer? Even with writing this blog post, I want to slap myself and not post this because I’m sounding CRAZY and no one should be bothered with such crap from a 31 year woman. But the 3rd person in me says it will be good to get this out, to be honest and to recognise that what i’m feeling is real. And that it’s not going away if I ignore it.
So here I am trying not to ignore it, and hoping that everything will get a bit clearer to me soon.
Image Source
I’ve spent the last week and a bit taking video of Jovie on my iPhone for the Rett Syndrome Video Study – something that’s right up my alley as I shoot a billion minutes of video a month, and don’t mind editing together a little video now and then 🙂
All 27 minutes (complete with titles & music, lol) is currently rendering and will be sent off to the Aussie Rett team today – I feel good about doing something to help Rett Syndrome research in Australia!
I just registered teamjovie.com so that will be a dedicated space for Rett Syndrome fundraising and events that I’m involved with, but I’ll still talk about RS and Jovie here
