R U OK?Day 2011 is on 15th September, today. On this day they want everyone across the country from all backgrounds and all walks of life to ask friends, families and colleagues: “Are you OK?”.
There has been 2 important times in my life when I needed to hear that from someone…
R U OK?
You might not know about this about me, actually I bet you don’t as I’ve never spoken it about it. When I was a kid, growing up in the suburbs, not a care in the world and as innocent as they come – I was repeatedly and regularly sexually assaulted by a neighbour. A trusted neighbour. Someone we saw every day.
Back then, I didn’t realise what was happening was not right, or I would of certainly said something. So it stayed a secret for years until high school, and unfortunately during a Health class. I can’t remember the topic that set me off, but during that class the memories of my childhood were triggered and I flipped the poop out, internally. I didn’t want to believe it, but it couldn’t be ignored and it really blew my mind that I had experienced something so nasty, so young and so alone.
I began to withdraw from school, friends and probably reality itself. I began cutting myself, not in a suicidal way, but I guess it was a release? Whatever I was doing, it wasn’t good and thankfully I had amazing friends, who went above and beyond to ask me R U OK? when they saw the scars and poor bandage job on my wrists.
Without that R U OK?, you wouldn’t be reading a blog about a well adjusted (I like to think!) mum of two.
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R U OK?
The most recent time I needed to be asked R U OK? has been in the last week. Jovie’s autism diagnosis has both been a relief and a stressful time. My friends again have been the ones hanging on to me, asking whether we need anything and just sitting with us to listen and to talk it out.
They’ve met me at parks, brought over a frozen coke, sent me emails and left me amazing voicemails. My friends are reminders that my worries are their worries – that I am not alone in the fight.
Without this R U OK?, I don’t think I would be as clear as I am today about the whole diagnosis.
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You don’t need 650 friends on Facebook or Twitter. You don’t need the world’s most popular blog with readers from all over the world. You just need that 1 good friend that will give you some time out of their day to listen to you.
I am here if you need an ear, to vent or to talk something through.
My email is tracey@sh1ft.org – you can email me or use the form here – and I’m asking YOU right now – R U OK? This is open past today, whenever you want to email me, just do it.
Meegs RCN •